Birthing the World
Ostara, World Doula Week and Finding Balance in a Shifting World
This week, we welcomed Ostara, the Spring Equinox - a day where the light and the dark are in balance and the possibilities of a year ahead stretch out into the warmth of an early spring day. There are green shoots pushing through bare soil, birds calling their songs from branches tipped with buds ready for bursting, and the scent of new beginnings and rebirth in every breath. A good week to celebrate birth, balance and new beginnings, and perhaps why this is also the week we celebrate World Doula Week.
I birthed my eldest child in a birth pool, in the city hospital that my father died in, a skip and a hop from what would become both my children’s favourite park. It was not the home birth I had imagined, but I carried the home birth energy with me, and my baby girl was born, en-caul and perfect, into the hands of a midwife who had never witnessed a single unmedicated, natural birth before. Rosy cheeked and healthy, despite being more than 2 weeks over her “due dates”, she arrived exactly when she was ready to, and has maintained this position in all her days since. My second child was also born in a birth pool, at home, safely arriving into my own hands, a good half hour before the bustling midwives and paramedics arrived, breathing out their astonishment at another unmedicated baby daring to arrive without their expert supervision. Another “late” baby, more than 2 weeks over her “due date”, she too is a child who bides her time.
Escaping the pressure of induction, and all the other invasive procedures that were waved about as normal next steps when my babies didn’t arrive on schedule, was challenging. What made the difference for me was that in both cases, I had the support of women with experience of birth beside me, reminding me of the “my baby, my body” mantra, and advocating for me when I could not. From my anaesthetist friend whose knowledge of the health system helped me get a midwife who would support me in the way I needed her to, to the women who introduced me to the world of Doulas, the writing of Ina May Gaskin and Michel Odent, it was the voices of women around me that helped me find my own voice, and advocate fiercely for my birthing experience. With my first child, my sister stood at a hospital door to give me quiet space to progress without hinderance, and with my second, a woman who arrived as my Doula, and left as one of my dearest heart held friends kept the medical world and their well intentioned but unwanted assistance at bay so that I could birth as freely as I wanted to.
We hold all the birthing cards, as soon as we allow women to stand around us and support us in our journey. It was always the way, until men decided they knew our bodies better than we did. It is a change that is slow, but as more and more women take back their birthing power and reject the routine of isolation and over medicalisation in birth, I hope that having women as Doula, women as birth support, women in community before, during and after a baby’s arrival, may once again become the normal.
One artist who is working to support women and their birthing caregivers through her art is Hannah Thomas, owner of Womb to World. Creating holistic art to support families, midwives and Doulas as they prepare for birth, her watercolour images are gentle, informative and empowering, aiming to disrupt the power struggle so many of us find ourselves facing when medical systems believe they know our bodies better than we do. Earlier this year, I had the pleasure of chatting with her about her work, her work/life balance as a Home Educating Mama of two daughters, and her early inspirations for the business in my new Seven Questions for a Creative interview series.
Thank you so much for agreeing to chat Hannah. I’d love to hear about your earliest memory of painting and how you feel about it now looking back on it as an adult?
My earliest memory of painting was at a school trip. I was in primary school and we were staying at a house in the New Forest, which was completely terrifying for me to be away from home, worrying about whether I'd like the food they served, if I’d feel safe at night, if my friends would include me, if I’d feel comfortable with the activities. I didn't want to go. But I thought I should.
One day they all went to go kayaking in the lake by the house, but I felt too scared (terrified of water, and led to believe my body wasn’t capable), so they thankfully let me stay behind and paint. Which was great for me, but also came with a bunch of guilt about not 'being brave' and joining in, and being normal like the others. We sat in the grounds and I painted a picture of the house. I remember getting a lot of approval for how lifelike my painting was, and they displayed it in the foyer of the school when we got back.
It sticks in my mind as it's an example of how children are conditioned to value others' approval of their art over the enjoyment of the process. I painted a picture of the house because I knew the teachers, and my parents, thought it was worthy when I created images that looked realistic. I remember people exclaiming over how much it looked like the actual house, and I felt good, and seen.
Can you tell me about the first piece you created for Womb to World?
When I was pregnant with Maggie I started painting myself affirmations. It was a beautiful time, all pregnant and hopeful, planning a healthy home birth. I watched YouTube tutorials, and painted for the first time since I left school. I was surprised at how quickly my technique improved just from practising a tiny bit. And I thought at the time - maybe one day I could paint birth affirmations for other people too. And maybe I could call it 'from womb to world'. But that seemed like a ridiculous dream for a totally different kind of person, the kind of person who actually does stuff. A capable kind of person. And I put it aside - maybe I'd do it when I was older.
Then when I got pregnant with Rosie, I was further along in my healing journey from childhood trauma. And I started working with a Sacred Intimacy mentor from LA - and whilst she was teaching me about the chakras, and how to discover my spiritual self - I suddenly realised that there was nothing stopping me from creating my art business straight away! I had already been painting the birth art and the diagrams that I wished I could find online - and I decided that I didn’t need to wait until I had a perfect business plan. I could just start straight away, with one picture. And I’d just take it one picture at a time - painting whatever felt right for me to communicate that day. And it transformed me.
My first listings were for watercolour birth affirmations. And they sold to a woman who had a beautiful home birth, and she credits them for contributing to it going so beautifully.
You’ve talked about your journey to feeling ok to "take up space" - do you feel like your work helps birthing women to do the same and how?
Equally, what are your thoughts about how your work offers ways for doulas and women supporting birth to hold space? Is this something you are intentional about when you are creating images?
So much of the problems our culture has around birth - how disempowered and medicalised it has become - is down to our wider conditioning as women that we need to be ‘good girls’. From such a young age we are taught, over and over again, that in order to be safe and wanted, we must be compliant. We must be quiet, and be approved of, not be needy, not be noisy, not be powerful. We are taught that in order to be accepted, and therefore safe, we must be agreeable, and keep ourselves small - to serve others over our own needs.
This does not translate well to supporting the physiology of birth. In order for the hormones and the processes of birth to go well, we need to make noise - we need to feel powerful - we need to feel safe to move however makes sense - we need to be sensual - we need to own our feelings and our needs without fear of judgement - we need to be in our bodies and trust them - we need to trust in the love of the Universe and believe fully that we deserve a beautiful birth. For me, I can see now that no amount of birth preparation, birth books, hypnobirthing classes, and doula sessions was going to undo a life of conditioning that has left me disempowered, not trusting my body, not believing in myself, not believing that Life loves me and protects me.
My hope with my pictures is to be a disruptor. I hope that the colour, softness, fun and femininity of my pictures will make mothers stop and think ‘maybe birth doesn’t need to be the way I thought?’ My hope is that the watercolour artwork will be the opposite of the scary-looking medical leaflets, language and posters they’ll likely see in their pregnancy journey - and it could be the spark that leads to trust in their bodies to do it without unnecessary medical assistance.
Can you talk to me about how you juggle Home Education and your creative life?
It’s hard. Initially, when I started, my eldest was a toddler and I would paint in the kitchen once she’d gone to bed. And it felt wonderful. Every day, I’d wake up and feel like there was something for me in the day, just for me, not about being a mother. But since my shop has grown, and I’ve started creating and stocking products, the admin, packing and posting has become the biggest part. And I'm finding that hard. I’m always hoping to go back to a life where I create more than I work.
I would never want my girls to feel they came second to my business, so I try so hard to let them know they are always the priority. If stock arrives, they will help me count things out and check them. When we’ve done events, they’ve helped organize and label the stock. If I have something I want to paint, I set it up so we paint all together. If I have orders to pack, they come up to the office too and either help me with stickers, or they do something else while I pack.
It is hard to feel ok about doing something that isn’t directly about them. But I know it is so valuable for them to see a mother who does something for her. It’s so good for them to see that it’s possible to make a business out of nothing. I love that they see me doing something creative, and powerful, that’s all me! And that means that they too can do the same. That’s an amazing message for a child to hear growing up.
I also don’t beat myself up about them enjoying the tablet, laptop or TV if I’m occupied with photography or website admin. I remind myself that I have created a wonderful environment for them - a beautiful, colourful, safe home for them full of books, games, puzzles, crafts, sensory play and baking - and it’s totally ok for them to enjoy learning and watching things on devices as part of that.
How do you create the right mental and physical space to paint and draw - do you need to be in a certain space/mood/frame of mind or can you just create anywhere? And if you do need quiet time/space to create, how you carve that out for yourself, whilst still consciously parenting.
In recent months, I have been struggling with anxiety and overwhelm, and I have recognised that this means I haven’t been drawing and painting very much. Part of the issue was that I’d have to clear space and get painting things ready in order to make anything - plus the girls’ bits - and that could take half an hour before I’d even started painting. So my husband recently built us a ‘creation station’. We gave away most of the furniture in the living room, and then he built a big desk so we have permanent space set up to create. I am hopeful that this will make it easier for us all to create more often, as I see that the set up is often what stops me making art.
I love how your art is not just for birthing mothers, can you tell me a little about how your work is received by people who are not birthing, and how you feel it helps them?
I have had some lovely feedback from people who gave birth a long time ago, or who supported their partner to give birth a long time ago - and said that my art is so meaningful to them. We had a man at an event recently who bought a mug with a painting of my baby and I, who said it brought back wonderful memories of his baby’s home birth 20 years before.
I think people may assume my art is just for mothers but really it’s for everyone - because we all have a mother, or know a mother, we are all born, we are all going through this life, with it’s cycles, and spiritual awakenings, the healing and the hurting and the rebirthing. For me ‘womb to world’ doesn’t mean pregnancy and birth - it means life. I was reborn when I became a mother, and started to uncover who I truly was, and my purpose in life.
I always like to ask 7 questions, and this one is the one I like best. What piece of information, experience, soul-felt words would present you share with past Hannah at the beginning of her creative journey?
Ooh, that’s nice. Well, I’d say - just carry on doing what you’re doing. Wake up, feel into what needs to be said that day, what needs to be pictured that day. I’d just tell her to trust herself, and do whatever she feels like. Because that’s where the magic is. Just do what lights you up - that’s where your purpose lies. Follow your spark.
I’m so grateful to Hannah for chatting to me about her work and inspirations as well as the challenges of Home Educating as a creative. I love Hannah’s work, especially her drive to inform and support birthing mamas to birth intuitively, advocating for their birth, their way, and have been so happy to share a little of her creative world with you. Reflecting on my own experiences, balance really is what we all strive for in all things - in birth, in parenting, in work, in our home and family life, and especially in our creativity, and while it is often hard to achieve, there is always the hope that we will find it. As we welcome a new season, and the sun rises on another Spring day, I share this hope with you, that we can all seek and find the balance we need to take us through all the days to come, as the world shifts around us.
I am writing these last words as the kettle boils for a cup of lemon tea, which I plan to take out into the garden with me for a quiet moment of stillness before another day begins. There are grape hyacinths and narcissi pushing through the pots by the door, and as I wrap up against the chill of the morning, I’m taking Hannah’s words of wisdom with me - “just do what lights you up - that’s where your purpose lies” and feeling grateful that I have this life where I can do exactly that.
Blessed Ostara to you. Here’s to all the possibilities and hope that Spring gifts us.
Love, Kate
Hannah Thomas lives and works in Oxfordshire, UK creating artwork to support Mamas, Doulas, Midwives, Birth workers and breast feeding educators. If you are a birthing Mama, or know one, or work to support women through pregnancyand birth, do take a look at Hannah’s Etsy and support her work in any way you can. Find her here.